Sunday, October 31, 2010

I made another wish. A wish to really come true.

I made another wish truthfully.

While I called myself selfish attending a party, my brother on the other hand, is lying helplessly in the hospital. The uncontrollable evil power.... I don't feel like describing it into details.

Upon the occurrence, I found myself being a coward, couldn't bare to take a straight look into the eyes. Being the eldest in the family, I feel useless and helpless to ease his sufferings and pains. If you tell me there are others suffered from severe diseases and illnesses, please TAKE BACK your words and say it to others.

In all, I could not do anything but to pray and wish for him.

I tried not to shed tears for I'm staying strong but this description failed in me. I'm weak. I couldn't even find the courage to face the whole disturbing situation.

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

how to gather back all the pieces of me?

for the past few days, unnecessary and important emotions ran through the veins. uncontrollable and undefinable measures.

i had a rough week to start, an extremely tough and hard day to begin the week.

it ignites the coward in me. my courage has shrunk and the images were torturing my mind. that, that... had all my fears to haunt me.

what happened had already happened. to shed tears do not reverse and erase what you want for time never goes back. yet, shedding tears is an aid of relief.

i can only mumble to myself to stay strong. pray for better days for all and YOU.

i don't want to be shatter.

amitabha. life's biggest bankruptcy is hopeless.

Friday, October 15, 2010

can u feel the night?

i'm feeling stress but i just felt reluctant to continue it. i don't have the passion and mood to do it right now, temporarily but i really feel depress to think about it. i got presentation coming up and i feel pretty useless when facing it. i'm still at the point of divergence even though i made my decision to choose a road but my feet refuse to make a step forward. like confucius said a journey of thousand miles begin with a single step yet i'm still stopping whatever progress i am having. its demotivating.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

fuck the heat waves

imma talk no more coz i am undergoing a wave that is completely torturing my mind and my body. fuck the heat waves that's circulating around the house from morning till night. damn!

Monday, October 11, 2010

three flavours. two types. one mouth.

alright, i made a combo of three flavours, two kinds and one mouth.

yes. banana, coconut and lemon. cake and tarts. to eat. apparently i spoiled the weighing machine which i ended up to use mathematical converters and calculators to ounce instead of grams. yet, the taste and texture still remains the same. i is winrar.

few days ago, i finished sewing my zippers pencil case and i still have not use it. next project, it's a coin pouch with zippers also. there are two sides, the cool colors and the summer colors.

evening caught me a surprise. the flowers had finally bloomed and it's perfectly pink. not like other eeckie pinks which made me puke for sure.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

just few of my likenesses from ma eyes

no intention to post for i am lazy to transfer my mini project pictures into the pc. thus, i shall post it next time.

i am here today to post something recurring my likenesses and memories.

first, the emptiness of the space that perks up the bland color of the walls. the red chair that is the main character of the picture.

second, the girl with pearl white skin and with stereotyping, we called it pale. nevertheless, her pearl-ness skin tone is balance and sweet with the striking flowers that stay behind her ears.

third, this picture with two kittens are so cute and the title is library. yeah, it reminded me of students of couples that hanging in the library as an excuse for dating or courtship. hahaha.

finally, i wanted to own good camera since high school and now it feels like getting commercial. even form 1 students can afford it. gooddamn. so i divert it to drums first. photography comes later though i still love stealing pictures over deviant art.

i present you this drum cover for my favourite song. the video title says it.

P/s: i wanna get a baby blue nail polish.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Bossa Nova

I discover a new genre that can be dwell finely along with my soul... ah... what am I talking??? my soul?? never mind, forget that.

New genre called Bossa Nova. it's a type of jazzy moment from Brazil. Majority are from Brazil and it gives me the fun and sexy at the same time. Some sort of chilling beach party.

Here's the sample of Bossa Nova by Bebel Gilberto. Live version. Okayhthanksbye.

Blissful dwell within..............













Eat. Pray. Shit. Spend. Love.

Before I tuck in, I want to share something and it's called Eat Pray Love. Fuck noh, I'm not gonna write like her. FYI, I just dislike watching sentimental movies in cinema and I only go to cinema for surround sound system which concludes ACTION MOVIES. In the end, I only enjoyed the music scores and songs that was in the movie. FYI2, this movie, I wasn't looking forward to it.

Okayh, I watched the movie yesterday and honestly, this 2 hours plus movie is pacing fast. I still opt for the book instead of movie. It leaves me no memories from the scenes except the typical scenery view which I predicted.

This movie took away my initial motivation in search of balance but after I watched the movie, my search for balancing came first before the movie was released. I do sound like a spoiled brat, don't I? You must've been shock that I'm still searching for balance which totally explains why sometimes I secluded/isolated myself. Yet, don't you think I'm too young to look for balance?

Liz is fortunate you know and she's whining which she didn't realized that there are other unfortunate people out there. She already owned and pawned all the things to make her dream come true and she whined???

It still leaves me to sadness when I don't see myself achieving anything. But my theory is Eat. Pray. Spend. Shit. Love.

The author is consider pretty. I can't believe James Franco is inside the movie. He's hot alright but in the end, Julia Roberts goes with Javier Bardem. Luca Argentero who plays Liz's Italian translator is completely chilling my eyes, his smile had charmed me. Ahahaa. Real Italian okay!

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

suck it and fuck it

She made me feel like dancing and singing with it. So dynamic and slightly dramatic just the way I wanted.

My lessons are getting tougher than I ever thought and I don't have music class history except choirs. Ironically, I still sound a bit deaf tone and dumb beat. Nevertheless, I must not give up for I'm paying my fees with my hard earned money. Damn!

I'm back with stealing arts and I love my 'crimes' on the line. Pictures sizes are too big to insert here.

why is everyone going for holidays and mine is on the wrong time???????

i is fucking jealous okayh and the farrest i ever traveled this year so far was SINGAPORE!

Sunday, October 3, 2010

oh, crystal ball crystal ball

It's holidays and I still feel the stress from my part time job. It's really stress until my soul is wandering from the concretions.

Thus, I feel like giving away free hugs while pondering on the song 'Details in the Fabric'. Life just turn bland again. *sigh*

Mum claimed I have hearing problems but there's a history she's not aware of it. Probably slightly damaged.

I feel like getting a lomo camera for myself but lomo's works can't be transfer to computer. I look like part of Simpsons. Hahaha. My old shit habit came back... brutal abuser of internet for relieve.

I've not dreamt far to play in a band but I just want to realize a dream that I've longed for. Drums. Ahhh... the beauty of the hard beats.

Recently, my adorations for Lady Gaga is getting stronger and regardless how much she had worships satan, that is none of my business. I only care for her self esteem and courage which she portrayed herself into her songs but not her vids. Do come to Asia.. when I have the ability to afford her tickets. =)