I still fear but it takes a whole amount of courage to stand up

Hello? Hi? Hey?... tired of any typical announce-my-presence greetings. Sometimes, simple smile and head nodding will do. Ya know what I dislike, people shaking hands without sincere.

Anyways, for the past few days weren't any other ordinary good days for me. Once again, I've to undergo the same fear and the cowardly act. No, honestly, yeah. It's still feels unreal to be in fear again. Numerous of nightmare episodes that repeatedly haunting the mind.

It would be sick and irritating to continuously seeking for the same 'therapist' for some ala therapy talks. I can't help but I need comfort and trust-able 'pillow' for me to confess. Someday, somewhere, sometime when it occurs, I've to be facing it alone but when can I have the courage to face it?

My friend taught me to keep myself in the place I'm most comfortable with... I'm looking for a place like this, minimalist artistic.

Although I look as if alright and sleeping soundly in the midst of night, to be honest, I wasn't sleeping sweetly like everyone does. Best part is I don't shed tears for I'm braver than what I've thought.

Buddha, please bless and grant for a tiny peasant's wishes to be good for all.

Adore this look.

I love the bowtie

When i look at the runway, i really want to trespass

Can I trespass the airport runway near my house for photoshooting? Me love the view when there's bright blue sky and not so much of the sun, just enough brightness to capture my world.

I'm beginning to love Lomography. You don't know what are the outcomes that leave you a plentiful of surprises. =)

Days go by- Dirty Vegas

So, I've been thinking a lot actually.

How's this?

What if one day a big massacre by begin their slaughters in the country in this era?

What will you do when the massacre days arrived?

I had these fantasies of living in New York long time ago and one day, I began picturing myself in Coney Island enjoying pastel pink cotton candy, hanging out in Coney Island till the sunsets, holding the LC-A camera snapping pictures I like, get a temporary tattoo from there and also getting ecstatics to hop onto all the rides like every other child in Coney Island.

All these moments were just like John Mayer's Clarity music video except I stayed dry in Coney Island.

Anybody wants to fly me to NYC?

*I've tried Fisheye Black 2 and toy camera is fun. It makes you feel spontaneous and lively again! Fun Fun Fun. Don't think, just shoot!!!!!!!

Thinking of owning one and then go around to be spontaneous.

December is coming and I'm falling in love again with Ingrid Michaelson's December Baby. The time has come. I'm content with what I've but not the time that was formed by the Universe.

*Sigh*

just few of my likenesses from ma eyes

no intention to post for i am lazy to transfer my mini project pictures into the pc. thus, i shall post it next time.

i am here today to post something recurring my likenesses and memories.

first, the emptiness of the space that perks up the bland color of the walls. the red chair that is the main character of the picture.

second, the girl with pearl white skin and with stereotyping, we called it pale. nevertheless, her pearl-ness skin tone is balance and sweet with the striking flowers that stay behind her ears.

third, this picture with two kittens are so cute and the title is library. yeah, it reminded me of students of couples that hanging in the library as an excuse for dating or courtship. hahaha.

finally, i wanted to own good camera since high school and now it feels like getting commercial. even form 1 students can afford it. gooddamn. so i divert it to drums first. photography comes later though i still love stealing pictures over deviant art.

i present you this drum cover for my favourite song. the video title says it.

P/s: i wanna get a baby blue nail polish.

oh, crystal ball crystal ball

It's holidays and I still feel the stress from my part time job. It's really stress until my soul is wandering from the concretions.

Thus, I feel like giving away free hugs while pondering on the song 'Details in the Fabric'. Life just turn bland again. *sigh*

Mum claimed I have hearing problems but there's a history she's not aware of it. Probably slightly damaged.

I feel like getting a lomo camera for myself but lomo's works can't be transfer to computer. I look like part of Simpsons. Hahaha. My old shit habit came back... brutal abuser of internet for relieve.

I've not dreamt far to play in a band but I just want to realize a dream that I've longed for. Drums. Ahhh... the beauty of the hard beats.

Recently, my adorations for Lady Gaga is getting stronger and regardless how much she had worships satan, that is none of my business. I only care for her self esteem and courage which she portrayed herself into her songs but not her vids. Do come to Asia.. when I have the ability to afford her tickets. =)

Ohkaythanksbye.

Northern Xinjiang. Forget the riots and let's go there.=!

It's lucky for me to flip the newspaper today and stumble upon a place that really looks like my fairytale.

It's Northern Xinjiang, don't ask me where but that place it's fill with magnificent mountains, mysterious flower fields and sparkling mirror-like rivers. It's stunning and even stunning than Bali, I guess. Forget the riots and chaos created from the disputes among themselves, we can't even lend a hand to them so let's go there and be at peace. Feast for the eyes.

It really fishes my soul away for I'm not the type of scenery viewing person. Once again, it really depicts my so call fairy tale, much better than New Zealand. My imaginary jigsaw puzzle. If only I can fly to Northern Xinjiang right now to heal all the sorrows.

Most importantly, these kids look healthy living in such serene environment. Simple is happiness.

The Golden Revolution 2010: I dunno what else title 2 I shud give

Part 2 is here... while everyone is probably struggling to finish their FYP, trying to stay awake for FYP or sleeping. I just finish and I'm free to blog here. Suddenly, I'm craving for Battle Studies- John Mayer, so emo sial... but I still love it! I've got class at 8am later... Wee.....

The first day of event, 3hours before reaching the venue (8.30am), I had an overnight (more like overdawn) over my team mate's house. I am not quite sure if I was asleep or awake. Barely had winks of sleep yet the hormones were injecting some sort of natural energetic hormones. Instead, we took pictures and did some rehearsal for our presentation to beloved VIP.

Yes, the gold's hidden secret is... *kaching*

A short briefing from our leader before the event officially begins!

Our VIP is somehow associate with the Islamic OSK finance with high ranking post.

Thanks to sayangs for coming and visiting, tho, some unfortunate event occurred on Meera.

My work! Financial crisis 2008 and also (not shown here) the Asian Financial crisis 1997

Day 2: A lil bit relax and had more fun. Unfortunately, little did everyone knew, our division was somehow attracted by two fucking laotikos. Taking advantage on every girl. May their soul burn with hell's grueling fire and their soul could never to reincarnate. Fuck you! People just don't understand how hostile we felt. Overall, there was some inflatable jumping castle... we did went in and play, oh boy, it smells and my first time playing it, I was being unconscious. I was laughing endlessly for no reason. ??? Coloring contest, we had to persuade parents to persuade their children to participate in this coloring contest. Games were canceled last minute... that's where I sulked cause no fun and no climax. Fashion show.. was fun... as in I had fun cheering and shouting, was fucking high that time. By the way, we came extra early cause we were told to have rehearsal for closing ceremony and when the time comes, fuck! No one told us it was canceled and we had to be posers.

The jumping castle. Just for kids

Coloring contest, there are talented children there and their masterpiece.. wonderful!

Hui Lu, Yap and Jun Siang

Shy Yi posing with mineral water accompanied by lengzais.

Was being abused...

If you notice the globe, the sea is filled with words like inflation, crisis, bankruptcy and so on. While the land is covered with paper monies! Hell yeah! Good work by art and deco division.

Kiss the gold and silver!

Whatever you would like to imagine it as...

Nik calls it the living art.

Balloons were everywhere but me hate pink.

Dah... so tired.

We had plasma tv for our event... not for prize giving but to replace projector.

The end of fashion show

The division leaders.

All of us!

ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lastly, this event is all about creating awareness to the public about how gold can hedge all the fucking shit crisis and inflation. Being in Technical Information division, I did learned a lot of stuff about Dinar and Dirham and learn about psychology. =)

Alright... Night.

I want to watch Transformers again. hahaha...

Tastebud curiosity

I had just finished to pick up those negative chi and it provoked me again. I just cleared my thoughts to go on with my aimless days but they just have to provoke me. I'm so helpless where I can't defense myself.

Within these 24 hours, I managed to download games' songs such as Megaman X5 and X6 and also Tomb Raider Anniversary theme song. Those are totally awesome music that brought back my memories especially the Megaman series. I was struggling to pass each stage and determined to get a 'S' rank. In the end, I didn't make it because I was too lazy to get the 'S'.

I'm wondering if my taste buds can take the eeky Maggie mee + Mayonnaise= ?

Just like in the movie, I wonder how does it gonna taste like.

Previously, I've tried

Fries + Chocolate Sundae= Marvelous

Fruit Vinegar + Soups= Heart warming

Raw Egg + Milo= Yuck

Maggie Mee + Mayonnaise= Taste like how ar?

My past mid autumn festival which I still don't understand the fun of playing with candles

I wasn't upset nor glad for what I've written in my answer sheets. But, I was frustrated over my memory department up in the holy brain. "I've read this before and I memorized it, what the fuck??? I couldn't recall". That's my condition in there.

After the paper, I skipped and hopped for no reason till I reach my car. Really sick frustrating.

Oh... Apparently, Saturday night I went to gramp's house for celebration. Moon cake Festival with potluck dinner. All I can say is I had fun with kids and adults except I didn't go around the area with a lantern. It was a drizzling day. Dowh.. I only helped those kids to lit the candles which I couldn't find the fun part asides from watching the candle to melt.

Apart from eating the *expensive like hell* mooncake, I could only remember eating my aunt's fried chicken and Coco feeding me numerous pieces of mooncake and pizzas???

The candle fun which I still don't understand

Kids these days don't understand the meaning of dangerous

Lit the candles... control macho

And so I made these brats to take pics with me.

My attempt to kiss COCO

Wen, Me and Coco... I can't help but to keep repeating the pose. Haha

Genius Lim's attempting to pose like lala

See lar.. my cousin can't bare to look at his face.

Even with grandma... haha

His father claimed he's the God of Gambler. Only the back can be taken. LOL.

I cheated two road accidents today. *Phew*